Tuesday, 23 February 2010

An Appointment with the Devil......

What a day! What a day! We've just got back from our visit to see "the bloke who sticks needles in us once a year." Thank goodness that's all over for a little while - a year probably. I had second thoughts this morning, and decided to make a run for it. As the appointment was this afternoon, I thought it best to wait until after lunch - I mean there's no point in missing out on a meal is there. So I played it very casual by loafing around on the settee. I could see "the one I don't trust" looking very smug. "I don't think they know what is going on" he said to "the pretty one." Just to be on the safe side, I moved closer to the flap.

Just before lunch, he put his coat on and went out of the front door. Excellent I thought, just time for a short nap before I'm off. What a sly and deceitful person he is. Unbeknown to me it was all part of his grand plan. He crept around the side of the house, and blocked the flap from the outside. How underhand can you get - I was trapped. Oh he did look pleased with himself when he came back in. I was furious, and dived for cover under the stairs. "There's no escape now" said Ginger Tail. "Best give in gracefully."Unfortunately she was right, so cometh the hour, we were all unceremoniously crated up. It really is most undignified. We soon arrived at this seedy looking establishment - it smells most unpleasant. The hard faced receptionist pointed us in the direction of the waiting room, checking only that "the one I don't trust" had remembered his wallet! Do you know, there were even dogs waiting in the queue. What is this world coming to. When it was our turn, the three of us were taken into the inner sanctum where "the bloke who sticks needles in us once a year" plies his evil trade. "Let's have the troublemaker" he said sadistically. That's good I thought, Tabby is going first. But no, I was dragged out of my box on to the table. I'll give him troublemaker. I must be one of his more important clients, because I noticed the words "WATCH THIS ONE" in big red letters on my file. "Is he overweight" said "the pretty one." The sweaty little failed medic prodded me about and said "yes he definitely is." Outrageous I thought, I demand a second opinion. "You're fat" chuckled Tabby from inside his box.Time for the jab - do you know it was all over before I had time to bite him. I can't understand what the fuss was all about. "Does it hurt" asked "the pretty one." "Only when I give you my bill" he replied with a wicked grin on his face.

Now here is the funny part, when Tabby and Ginger Tail were done, he said that they were overweight as well. Mind you, he can talk - looks like he's shifted a few pies in his time! Anyway, he then went on to say even though I am the heaviest, in actual fact, the other two are proportionately fatter than me, because I am a much bigger cat - strong and muscular I think he meant to say. So there's a turn up for the book. All that was left, was to pay the bill. "The one I don't trust" went pale when he saw it. As we left, he was mumbling something about whether they wanted the shirt off his back as well. No idea what they would do with that.Well, that's your lot for today. You will be pleased to know, that we are safely back home. Before going for a stroll, I had a few well deserved prawns. When I got outside, I noticed a new sign on the next door neighbours gate "Beware of the Dog" it said. I nearly fell over laughing - I mean, it is only a silly little Jack Russell - perhaps the owner's worried that someone might trip over it! What a Life! AlbertThe(immune)Cat.


  1. Glad you survived the horror and indignity of it all.

  2. Hey Albert, I haz red warnin stickers all over my file too! An I iz banned from da VET for 3 yrs cos of my "attitude"!

  3. Glad you all lived through the nasty experience of the VET

  4. Albert... Glad you survived the ordeal. The vet where I went had my chart marked that I was afraid of medical types... so she would always take off her white coat before coming in the room... as if I didn't still know where I was and where they were going to put that thermometer... Woooooooo Eeeeeee!...

    Have a good rest of your day.

  5. Oh noes! Not the V-E-T! So sorry you had to go through that, furiends.